You Quit Your Job Without a Backup Plan? Was It a Burnout Or Rust Out?
You Quit your Job Without a Backup Plan? Was It a Burnout Or Rust Out? Imagine being in your late 20s and having the guts to finally say, “It’s over!” to your job. Hi! That’s me. Now I am a woman contemplating all my decisions and what could have been if I didn’t waste my time in that demeaning job. All for what? Money? Yes. But also, for a chance to make it in the fashion industry. I very much needed it. I always berate myself for every move I have made and continue to make. Every day for a year and a half, I have asked myself questions I knew the answers to but was too dubious to act on them. Did I go to college for THIS? How will this add value to my resume? How will I make it financially? I knew very early on what I did not want to do but what is it that I want to do now that I have the time? Do I really have time? I haven’t thought this through and I’m anxious just thinking about it. Sounds familiar? I’m here to tell you all about it. But first things first. What is the difference between a burnout and rust out? Let’s find out. Burnout is when you work to a point where you forget you have a life outside of work. Sometimes it’s the money that drives you. Sometimes it’s the experience you are after. For me, I was new, I wanted to learn everything, explore every department in the industry. I wanted to build good connections and most importantly, I wanted to appear so enthusiastic and responsible that I couldn’t say no. Chances for a burnout could also be that your workplace is understaffed and you are required to work multiple roles alone. I remember the time I got hired. My first question was, “What will my designation be at this firm?” To which I was told, “You don’t have any. You will be required to do X,Y,Z.” All were unrelated and it sounded like a three person job but I took it anyway because that’s how desperate I was to get back to work after the pandemic. You know what I’m talking about, right? On the other hand, rust out is like being in a slump. When you are just uninspired and the job feels unfulfilling in every aspect. You are neither upskilling as an individual nor as a team. It’s the same mundane routine and you feel like you would give anything to not be in this situation. It’s possible that I have experienced them both subsequently. Haven’t we all though? I am just grateful to have the chance to take a little break now and explore my career path. Where at my age, my sisters were busy putting food on the table no matter what. I’ve been told a bunch of things by my colleagues, friends and family that make sense. I’d be lying if I said I never had those thoughts myself. I’ll just list them out, they are in no way a solution to anything. This is more like blind leading the blind. Something we can laugh about later. Don’t quit without another job lined up. This has to be the most common one I’ve heard from almost everyone I know. You will feel great for the first few weeks but eventually it will hit you that you aren’t going anywhere. It will start getting frustrating. It’s true and you should have a backup before you quit your job. But only if you want to continue doing what you were doing. Keep applying till you get a better deal out of it. If not, what is it that you really want to do now? Write that down and work towards it. What about the money? How will you pay for stuff now? Well, there’s freelance work. Pick a niche. You can always connect with people and pitch ideas, depending on the kind of service you will be providing them with. It’s a great side hustle and if you’re looking on how to start then social media is full of them. Do your research. It’s okay, take this time to figure out what you want. I am so grateful to know a few and just the right people. Binge watch the show/movie you weren’t able to before. Read the book that’s been sitting in your bag for a while now because you thought you’d get the space and time on your commute but didn’t. Take this time to explore hobbies and yourself. Pick up your life from where you left (like you would pick up a friend for a drive), one day at a time and take life on a ride for a change. It’s possible to feel guilty from time to time but don’t let it overpower you. You needed a break anyway. You know it. But remember to not settle with this feeling, rather start over. It’s always easier said than done but you should try. Take up a course, upskill yourself. I say the best way to upskill is by practicing and being open to learning new techniques. In the real world, smart work is appreciated more than the hard work. Always. Which is why I feel people with industrial experience have more knowledge than the ones who take up course after course and have nowhere to incorporate that knowledge. Indulge in an internship before you sign up for a course. Trust me, you’ll learn more. Go out and connect with people offline. One of my freelance clients, who has worked for more than ten years at a bank and later quit to become an entrepreneur, said this to me as an instance: “If you want to be an entrepreneur, you will never be able to start by interacting with people with jobs. Chances are they will never think beyond their job. You cannot be motivated by them. So take
Overwhelmed by Life? Here’s How I Found Balance as the Youngest Sibling
Overwhelmed by Life? Here’s How I Found Balance as the Youngest Sibling If the title made you read this, I can see why. Welcome to the group! I don’t mean let’s be miserable together, I just hope you feel better somehow. Being the youngest in my family, I’ve always had the privilege of time. Like the hand-me-downs my sisters thought would look good on me, they’ve always been mindful of what I inherit from them to build my personality too. I’ve seen my sisters work around the house and help maa from a young age whenever we had guests over. Which was a lot. It was almost as if we were running a guest house, it’s not even funny. Relatives, am I right? But I’m talking about the times when the occasional guests used to come over. I got lucky because all I had to do was greet them, sneak out to get something from the shop sometimes, even take a nap and eat the snacks after they’d left. Like any boy would. *No offence, boys!* I was pretty happy as long as I didn’t have to interact with people or help in the kitchen. I assumed that’s how it’ll always be, but then reality hit me hard when maa started giving me tasks. “Help your sister change the sheets, rearrange the cushions, serve the tea, don’t stand with me in the kitchen, I’ll do this, you go sit and talk, ask them if they need something”, she said. Until now I was only maa’s little helper. I would taste whatever delicious food she made and share funny anecdotes with her. Now, I had to interact and do chores? She was definitely onto something. I was being trained to do what my sisters were doing all along. But why? Was I not a cute, shy kid anymore? Was I growing up? Were my sisters going somewhere? Did they have some bigger tasks to take over? Did maa want to relax now after all these years? That, she should have done a long time ago. Or, did she just want me to learn and be independent? It was happening. My sisters were going off to college and it was time for me to fill their shoes. At that moment I just wanted to tell them to stay and that I could never fill their absence at home. I still can’t. That’s the thing actually. The youngest siblings have a reputation for being carefree, with the least responsibility and rebellious, but what you don’t know is that we have to live up to the ones before us. Even if no one asks us to. It starts the moment we are born. As kids we blindly follow them into whatever they do or teach us. Initially it’s the little things like clapping, running, drawing, playing, dancing, singing which later on shifts to getting good grades, getting a job, building a career, learning survival skills, you know the rest. It’s exhausting. But we make it exhausting. We’re protected for too long that suddenly we start running out of time. I’ve had two pairs of shoes to fill, both literally and figuratively bigger than mine. I’d like to fast forward and see how that turns out. Times like these can be daunting. Here’s what can help you go through it without making it so. You are never alone! If there’s one thing we all share, it’s this life – Everyone goes through it – Seek inspiration They say, “The only person you should compete with is the person you were yesterday.” It’s true! That’s one way to keep yourself sane. But there’s no harm in looking up to someone. We all need a mentor in life. They may not necessarily be your family. Just someone who can hold the torch for you in the dark and guide you when you are lost, overwhelmed and zone out. Because at some point in life, they’ve been there as well. So they know what you’re going through. A friend, a partner, a colleague and in times when you feel the need to isolate yourself from any human interaction-podcasts, movies or music also tend to say things you’d want to hear to feel better. They can only guide you, they can’t walk your path for you. No one can. Among all the mentors I have, my sisters have held that space in my life for the longest time. Remember, there’s always a solution. You just have to find it, with or without someone. The key is to look confident even without being one As you grow up, you’ll realize that “fake it till you make it” is the only way forward. Take it from your parents, when was the last time you saw them low and having a breakdown in front of you about a situation? They never let us see what they are dealing with, and that’s something we have in common. We try not to embarrass them or let them down because they’ve invested in us so much. Almost their entire life. But when it comes to the outside world, you don’t owe anything to anyone. So, act like it. Just go out there, do your thing, be kind and never let anyone see what you’ve been feeling inside. If you’re not confident about yourself, you will easily feel triggered because of other’s insecurities. It will always feel like you’ve been targeted for being you, like something’s wrong with you when in fact, no one cares what you do. We’re all busy thinking about ourselves. So yes, confidence is the key you should own even if you misplace it sometimes. Find something to transfer that energy to This is where a hobby comes in handy. You don’t have to ignore your feelings but you really need an escape before it gets dark. Indulging into something you like is a great way to cope with it. Get some fresh air, read a book, workout, cook, paint, watch a movie, whatever escape means to you – do
When Do You Know That You’ve Grown up?
When Do You Know That You’ve Grown up? Who do you want to be when you grow up? It’s a question we’re asked time and again since childhood. Does it ever stop? Yes. It does when you graduate. Because then, you’re assumed to have your life all figured out. Remember in school, when everyone used to discuss the answers after exams and it was right if it matched the back of the book? This is somewhat similar. Except, the answer has changed so often and I’m still figuring it out. But you know what? My answers never matched with others anyway. Which is not good if you’re in school. Chances are, you’ll flunk the test. I may be saying this to feel better but in life the answer doesn’t have to match and that’s the beauty of it. As adults we are so caught up with our own struggles that nobody cares who you are unless you’re happy. Whatever that means to you. That’s the answer we’re all trying to achieve. I have so many questions about adult life and there’s so much to unlearn. You read it right. I said, “Unlearn”. The day you fathom who you want to be, is that when you know you’ve grown up? They say, “Your 20s are for you to take risks.” But it’s easier said than done, don’t you think? Let’s take job for an instance. Once you get a job, there’s no way you can have a work-life balance. It’s not practical. There’s only so much you can do in 24 hours that it gets overwhelming. You’re always giving something up. So, when will you take the risks? People often share their stories when they’ve overcome something. But I want to share a little part of mine because I’m still working towards it. It was 2019! I remember being terrified when I was seeking my graduation project internship. There was a lot going on. I felt like I’d messed up everything, including my room and my body to a point where it wasn’t healthy anymore. I was working just as hard as others but as my batchmates were getting confirmation emails, I was getting anxious. With a week left, I still wasn’t able to land an internship. Then just four days before we were supposed to join the firm, I got a call for an interview and after much anticipation came THE email. It said a lot of things, one of them being “I am happy to offer you an internship at our atelier.” I was the happiest and so proud in that moment. Those three months have been the highlight of my existence. It will always be the place where I met some amazing people, witnessed great work and had the best experience of my life. I’ve realized it’s so important to have a positive workplace otherwise you’ll often find yourself in a slump. This place gave me the confidence I needed but also had my hopes high about the fashion industry. It felt as if I was about to get my dream job right after I graduated. And I knew I would be content with my work forever, even if it meant working late. Then covid happened and things changed. Anyway! I’m grateful to have a job now because God knows how desperate I was when there weren’t any. I’m not saying I’ve given up or I want to. No way! In fact I believe that everything happens for a reason and it will make sense eventually. Just like your periods. You have mood swings, you over eat and one day when you see the stain, it makes sense why you were being so weird. There are days when I feel confident and days when I feel like an imposter. It’s a feeling where I’m the only one holding a degree in the crowd to prove that I belong here because of this piece of paper. I’ve known people who love what they do but I’m not that person right now. Maybe that’s what I want to become when I grow up. I want to work and love every bit of it.